When we get boring, we often read funny quotes and sayings for our spirits and change our mood. Funny short sayings are bound to make you laugh. Funny sayings and quotes are not only which provides us something to think about but also a source of entertainment and laughter and everyone likes a good laugh.
Funny Quotes and Sayings become a way for smile and you can forget all your sadness for sometime. There are different types of funny quotes; some funny quotes and saying are given below.
Funny Quotes and Sayings List
“Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils”
“I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar”
“The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see well than he can think”
“Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference”
“The only way to make your PC go faster is to throw it out a window”
“When an actor marries an actress they both fight for the mirror”
“There are only two kinds of men – the dead and the deadly”
“The trouble with children is that they’re not returnable”
“A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book”
“Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee”
“A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished”
“In my house, I am the boss. My wife is the decision maker”
“I haven’t reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife”
“Hard work never killed anyone but why take a chance?”
“Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter”
“Love is like playing the piano. First you must learn to play by the rules, then you must forget the rules and play from your heart”
“Today is Valentine’s Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day.”
“Men are like steel; both are worthless when they loose their temper”
“You know there is a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the 3 R’s only one begins with an R”
“Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy — the mother”
“If you can’t convince them, confuse them”
“If you want to forget all your other troubles, wear too tight shoes”
“My mother’s menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it”
“Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It’s the transition that’s troublesome”
“I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury”
“You tried, and you failed, so the lesson is, never try”
“Angels can fly because they take themselves so lightly”
“Choose heaven for climate, hell for society”
“For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism”
“Men are like linoleum floors. You lay them right, and you can walk on them for 30 years”
“If love isn’t a game, then why are there so many players ?”
“The worst kind of love is the one when you want someone but you know you can’t have them”
“Adults are just kids with money”
“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out”
“A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway”
“Don’t waste your time on a guy that isn’t willing to waste his time on you”
“We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give”
“A person who never makes mistakes never makes anything”
“If you love somebody, set them free. If they return, they were always yours. If they don’t, they never were”
“Anyone can hate. It costs to love”
“Having nothing, nothing can you lose”
“Don’t drown the man who taught you to swim”
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Excellent post, you have brought up some big ideas to consider.